The world is full of idiots, and someone needs to point it out to them or they will never know.

Friday, July 19, 2013

Aren't There Enough Washed-Up Celebrities Here in Australia?

This may come as a shock, dear reader, but I watch television (I know, I hide it well). Sadly this also means I see a lot of ads, and I've noticed a disturbing trend lately. First, it was a series of ads for KFC with Joel Madden from Good Charlotte:

Click here to see the original ad. Caution: Joel Madden attempts to act.

If you haven't seen them, the ads are pretty dull, basically Joel Madden serves people in a KFC drive-thru. I'm not sure what message KFC wants to get across here: that celebrities want to work there? That their drive-thru staff are fun and wacky? That they're cool? (this must be it, nothing says cool like a sideways cap).

Anyway, what really bothers me about the ad is that this is an Australian campaign, with an American celebrity endorsement. Couldn't we have gotten some washed-up rocker from Australia for the campaign?

I guess I can let that one slide - after all, KFC is an American company, perhaps they'd just recycled a campaign they'd used in the US. A few weeks later, though, I saw this ad with Eric Stonestreet (Cam - the fat gay guy - from Modern Family) for Big W:

Click here to view the ad. Caution: it's stupid and irritating

To this ad's credit, it's obviously got a clear message: that even big-shot celebrities would find Big W amazing. But again, I have to ask, why is this American guy promoting an Australian company? Granted, Modern Family is popular here, but surely the public isn't stupid enough to believe Eric Stonestreet actually shops at Big W?

Oh, but it gets worse. Just recently, Target has started a new campaign featuring Gok.

Click here to view the original ad. Caution: Gok's in it

Yeah, I hadn't heard of Gok either, but apparently he's some fashion guy from the UK. Well, at least Target bothered to get a Q-list celebrity from a country other than America. Yet again the message is unclear - is Gok endorsing Target, or is Target saying that it has no idea what its Australian consumers want and have had to bring in some guy from the UK? (probably not the latter) But putting aside the message confusion, I have to ask: why is some celebrity from the UK is endorsing Target? Until Target Australia approached Gok with their chequebook, he probably didn't even have a clue they existed. The public can't be dumb enough to think he actually shops there... can they?

Then again, they listen to this guy...

Oh, but it's not just the advertising industry that's being invaded, dear reader. Reality TV has been hit by this as well! Behold, the imported judges for The Voice:

 L-R: Seal, Ricky Martin and Joel Madden (again). Christ, does this guy not even go to America any more?

While it's annoying that they're all not from Australia, at least these people are all musicians. Where it gets stupid, though, is the imported judges for Australia's Got Talent:

L-R: Dawn French, Geri Halliwell ("Ginger Spice"). I'd like to play with her spices, if you know what I mean

We can probably assume Halliwell knows a thing or two about talent (or at least, how to trick people into thinking you have it), but Dawn French? Why is she here? Does anyone believe she gave the slightest shit about Australian TV until Channel Nine drove a dump truck full of money to her house?

Finally, here's the imported judge for The X Factor:
Stefan Gordy - oh, sorry, "Redfoo" (sigh)

Words fail me here - though I do have something to say. LMFAO produce fine music, sure, but just look at Redfoo. Obviously he's not in the business of finding new musicians, he's a performer. And even if he was interested, why would he care about finding talent in Australia? Nobody really believes he's doing this for any reason other than the money, do they?

Folks, to put it bluntly, there's way too many imported celebrities on our screens. It reminds me of this old gag from The Chaser:

Now, I have nothing against the United States (I think it's a great country), but Jesus Christ guys, this obsession with America is getting ridiculous. I hesitate to blame KFC, Big W, Target and Channels Nine and Seven too much, since they're just going with what the public wants. But I don't know about you, but if I'm going to bother shopping at an Australian store (instead of buying online) or watching some Australian TV (instead of a DVD or another Simpsons repeat), I want to get some of my own culture.

I know Australians like American culture and all (and I like it too), but if we let them invade what tiny bits of culture we have (yes, advertising and talent shows are culture, but just barely) it won't be long before McDonald's starts offering "American" food as a special promotion, as if it wasn't already an American restaurant. I mean, that idea is just so ridiculous, it'll never, ever-

Oh, forget it. Just replace the Union Jack with the Star Spangled Banner already.

© 2013 by The Free Man


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